Not Sure What to Title This Post/Catch Up

So I have a terrible excuse for not writing on here sooner...you ready? I had forgotten my password. Yes, I know, terrible excuse! And when I really thought about what it could be, of course it came to my head. That's what I'm all about sometimes...excuses. I hate that about myself. I know I should just do something or make the phone call or make the plans or make the appointment, but I make excuses. It's terrible! Eventually if it's something I really want to do I do do it, but it's the other stuff. You know what stuff...the dentist appointment (its been a year), the getting the city sticker for my car (I moved to the burbs 2 months ago and never even had one for my car when I lived in the city), it's folding the laundry, it's all the stuff you know you HAVE to do, but just don't want to that day. Thank g-d my husband knows this about me, however, it's something he HATES about me. That's okay, I know he does and he sadly kind of just has to expect this from me.

Now let's get to the good stuff...the reason why I started this blog in the first place...Braedyn...Braedyn you are 16 1/2 months old. Where the *@#$ does time go? You are in the 90th %ile for height and 50th for weight (tall and skinny like your daddy) and you have such beautiful blue eyes, blonde hair (which is finally filling in) and fair skin (I lather you up with SPF 85). And you are funny! You still aren't walking on your own, but you will walk if you hold our hand. You say baba (milk), wawa (water), mama, dada, NO, boo (book), ca (car), papa, nigh nigh (night night), nana. And you are sweet. Anyone who comes in contact with you say two things: 1. How is it possible you (me) produced this child (those of you who know me-my one follower-can attest, this child looks nothing like me) and 2. She is sooo sweet! And you are. It's been an adventure this past year and 4 months. I can't believe how much fun I'm having with you! You are at such a fun stage now. I took you to the beach last week and you loved it and in the pool the other day and you loved that! I'm so excited because I love the water-your daddy isn't too thrilled about water so that leaves me, and this could be our thing.

Now to the sad stuff...I can't believe it's been a year since the passing of Mary. I really thought it'd get easier, but it really hasn't. There isn't a time when she pops into my head that I don't cry. It's hard for me to go to my parent's house and not want to yell, "Mary! I'm home!" And have her head pick around the corner and have her embrace me in her arms. I am so sad that she missed all these incredible milestones in Braedyn's life. The loss of someone is never easy, but I have found in this case, when it's the unexpectant loss, that's when it's more difficult to move on. And I guess move on isn't the right terminology, but it's coming to terms with. I'm just sad and I get a big blockage in my throat. For example, in the last two years between M and myself we have lost 4 grandparents-he 3, me 1, and knowing that they lived to see their grandchildren grow up and meet great-grandchildren was easier for me to understand the loss of them, than it is with Mary. I'm sorry I'm dwelling on this, but it's been on my mind.

Well, I'm hoping to write more updates, since it is summer and I will have more time...no more excuses!!

xoxo